Love is...not keeping score

This is a little something I wrote earlier this year for a friend's blog about what love is and what it means to different people.  I have been feeling so...I don't really have the words, but I adore my husband, and decided to repost this on my own blog.  Ridiculously sappy, yes, but hey, it's how I feel.

I take you to be my husband in good times and in bad, in plenty and in want, in sickness and in health…I promise to love and honor you all the days of my life.  Our wedding vows were pretty standard.  We looked deeply into each other’s eyes that day and believed every word we said, although I am not sure we truly understood what they meant. 

Next year we will celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary.  I hadn’t thought of our vows since that day until one morning last week.  We were in the shower.  Brian had one arm around my waist, holding my body against his, while he used his other hand to gently wash my hair.  It sounds romantic, maybe even sexy, but I was in agony.  It was 48 hours after my shoulder surgery and the first time I was allowed to take a shower.  If he hadn't been holding me, I wouldn’t have been able to stand.  It was at that moment, totally dependent upon my husband, that those vows came to mind.  There he was, totally devoted to my care for better or worse.  He woke up every 4 hours to give me pain medicine and replace my ice packs.  He helped me to the bathroom, got me dressed each morning, changed the dressing over my incisions, and put my hair in a ponytail.  Oh, and all during finals week no less, when his brain was already fried from endless homework and studying. 

It made me remember similar events, like my knee surgery, when he had to carry me up and down the stairs of our basement apartment.  Then there was my emergency kidney stone surgery, which left him with a three year old and a hungry screaming infant for two days, who had never taken a bottle…always there, always supportive, always devoted, rarely complaining.

Then I realized, since I have known him, he has never had surgery and has probably only been mildly sick a handful of times.  Wow, I’ve had it easy.  Brian laughingly chalks it up to his superior genes!  In my mind I don’t deserve such devotion and feel indebted to him for eternity, but he never makes me feel guilty. He knows that when his turn comes I will be there for better or worse all the days of my life.  

There are no notches on the bedpost, no bulleted list saved on our computer somewhere…no one is keeping score.  We approach each day with a clean slate, ready to do whatever it takes to uphold those words we so lovingly vowed to each other.  Now, after almost ten years of marriage, we are just beginning to understand what those words really mean.

Date 11 of 52: Living Room Campout

It's been awhile since we had a really involved date, so when one of Brian's teacher's gave an extension on this week's homework assignment, I jumped at the chance.  A little extra free time means date time!

We have been talking a lot about camping and actually just bought a bigger tent to accommodate our growing family.  All four of us have been camping in a little 2 person tent.  It was pretty big for a backpacking tent, but getting a little snug for a family of 4.  I had camping on the brain and decided to dig out the old tent and camp in our living room.  

I wanted to recreate the most important parts of camping; a bonfire, s'mores, the great outdoors, and good company.  Earlier in the day I gathered all the fixings for s'mores, a can of Sterno cooking fuel, decks of cards, miniature wildlife figures...

While Brian put the kids to bed I set up camp.  I used our large brown doormat to simulate the ground in front of our tent and made a "fire ring" with some large stones from the backyard.  I put a Sterno can in the middle of our fire ring and lit a match.  It was actually a pretty good indoor campfire.  It even crackled a bit.  I brought all our house plants into the living room and placed them around the tent for that outdoor feeling and scattered some rubber frogs, snakes, and lizards about the camp site.

Brian came down and I was using one of our fondu forks to roast a marshmallow over our roaring campfire.  He loved it and quickly started roasting one of his own.  We sat around the fire for awhile, munching on s'mores, drinking Shirley Temples, and talking.  Sitting around a Sterno can just isn't the same as sitting around a real campfire, so I was prepared with some other outdoor themed entertainment, the movie The Great Outdoors.  What's not to love about John Candy and Dan Aykroyd?

Raging Campfire

Our campsite was infested with snakes, lizards, and frogs!

We settled into our tent to watch the movie and munched away on other camp snacks.  I admit, in the end,  we did head upstairs to sleep in our bed rather than "rough it" in the living room, but we still had a great camping experience.

Date 10 of 52: Charades

Woops!  This date actually came after our Valentine's Day dates, but I completely forgot to post it.

Brian has a crazy work load, so I have been trying to come up with quick dates we can do for a study break, something to give him a break from all the seriousness.  I decided to do a silly game of charades. I told Brian to write down 5 nouns on 5 pieces of paper, and I did the same.  Then I put them in a box and we took turns drawing slips of paper and acting them out...typical charades.

Brian had no idea what the words were for, so he just wrote down the first things that came his mind.  Turns out he had cars on the brain, so I ended up acting out wonderful things like gas and steering wheel.  I, of course, knew what they were for so Brian got to act out things like swimming, flipping pancakes, and mountain.  Oooooo, I really went crazy with those ones!  He wouldn't let me take his picture to show off his amazing acting talents.

I have to say this date was not my favorite, but had us both laughing in the end, so I guess it was a success. Brian went back to his studies with renewed vigor, ok maybe not...

Date 9 of 52: SPRING BREAK, Part 2

We spent just over a week in Florida and took full advantage of the live-in babysitters!  This time I chose a  place for dinner, again, just downtown from where Brian's parents live.  We drove Brian's mom's cute little convertible and just let the wind in our hair blow away all the stress of the day...dealing with two boys that were out of their routine, monsters!

The restaurant was right next to a lake.  The clouds were building, but the rain hadn't started so we took our chances and sat at a table out in the open next to the water.  We ate some of the best calamari I have ever had, watched the lightening off in the distance, and listened for the rumble of thunder.  By the time we ordered dinner it had started to rain so we moved to the next table over that was covered by a big umbrella.  That seemed to keep us dry enough.  We didn't want to lose our great view of the storm.

The thunder got louder and we talked about going home early since Owen is afraid of thunderstorms.  Brian assured me that Nana was good with storms and could handle it, so we continued to enjoy our dinner and a show.  Eventually the rain got too heavy and we had to move in under the restaurant's covered porch.  It was fun to eat outside listening to the pouring rain, watching the little Anoles(lizards) run for cover, and the water stream off the palm fronds.

By the time we finished dinner the storm had passed, and we took a stroll around the downtown area.  It is a rather touristy area so there was a lot of foot traffic even after the storm.  There was a certain magic in the air with the lights reflecting on the wet pavement, couples walking hand-in-hand, and little girls asleep on their Daddy's shoulders as they headed home for the night.  Corny, I know, but it really was so nice.  The only down side was the number of mosquito bites I received while at dinner, all on my ankles and tops of my feet!  Holy itch!

Once again we came home to two sleeping little boys who had miraculously turned back into sweet little angels.  Thank you again, Nana!

Date 8 of 52: SPRING BREAK!

We have been a bit behind on dates, NOT GIVING UP, just behind.  We found the perfect opportunity to catch up on a couple dates during Brian's spring break.  Plus, we got to go on "real" dates.  We went to Florida to visit Brian's family.  Family = Babysitters!

It was Brian's turn, and he chose a little wine bar in downtown Celebration, Florida.  The weather was warm, but not too hot.  We sat at a table out front on the side walk and enjoyed a glass of wine as we watched people and their dogs walking by.  I absolutely love people watching, so it was a really enjoyable relaxing time.  We continued with a light dinner and somewhat heavy conversation.  Maybe deep is a better word.  Heavy has a negative connotation in my mind.  It wasn't our goal to talk about our fundamental beliefs or anything, but it turned out to be a great reminder of how well suited we are for each other.  Anyway,  by the time we were finished with diner it was getting a little cold so we decided to head somewhere else a little warmer for dessert.

We ended up at  Celebration Tavern.  They had big heat discs out on their patio so we sat under one and did some more people watching.  As we were leaving we saw Brian's cousin sitting at the bar and decided to stay a little longer to chat with her.  It was great to catch up with family and have a good laugh.

When we got home, the boys were in bed.  We sneaked into their bedroom and kissed their little heads good night.  Ahhhhh, a very nice evening.  Thank you, Nana!

Date 7 of 52: Relax

Our seventh date was actually on the same night as our sixth date.  Brian didn't know I had a date planned and snuck out to set up the ice cream sundaes while I was putting the kids to bed.  Once they were finally asleep, my date started...a massage at Spa Josefina (my name in my high school Spanish classes).

With Brian's crazy studying schedule and our crazy night with out-of-control boys, I thought this date was perfect.  We both needed to relax and just let all the tension fly away.  I put blankets on the floor, bumped up the thermostat so it would be warmer, got out the lavender massage oil, and had towels to use as drapes.  I greeted Brian at the door, introduced myself and asked if he had any areas that he would like me to concentrate on.  I tried to recreate the questions I usually get asked when I go in for a full body massage.  Then I told him to get under the towels and let me know when he was ready.  It was fun to play at the part of being a professional masseuse.

Well the date was a success.  Brian was just about asleep when I finished and very relaxed.  He decided to return the favor and gave me a dynamite massage.  Then we both floated off into lavender scented oblivion, ahhhhhh sleep.

Date 6 of 52: Valentine's Day Dessert

We ordered the kids bunk beds before Christmas.  The company makes each bed to order, so there is about a 6 week lead time till they are ready for delivery.  Then it can be another 10 to 20 business days for shipping.  Then add in the first shipment containing the beds in the wrong color and you have a long wait.  Cut to yesterday, Valentine's day, when the right beds finally arrived!  The kids had no idea they were getting bunk beds, and Brian and I had our work cut out for us, trying to keep them down stairs and occupied while the delivery man assembled them and took away all the packaging.  Owen, the little stinker, figured it out.

So, our valentine's Day dinner consisted of my running up and down the stairs trying to watch how the beds were put together and trying to eat, Brian trying to control Owen, who was literally vibrating in his chair with excitement, and me running back down stairs when it sounded like I needed to mediate.  It got a little stressful.  Finally, we took them upstairs to see their new beds.  The wait was worth it.  They were so excited.  Owen decided Mathias should sleep on the top bunk with him, and Brian and I should sleep on the bottom bunk.  They have been sleeping together in a queen sized bed for over a year, and it was hard for them to understand that they would not be in the same bed.  They were very excited about the new beds, but a little hesitant about sleeping apart.  Their closeness had been protection and comfort from things that go bump in the night.  I showed Mathias that Owen was just above him.  He got up and blew him a kiss.  After spraying monster spray all over the room and setting up a monster trip line in the doorway, they settled in...

Oh wait, no they didn't.  I ended up in the bottom bunk with Mathias, something I never do, but they both needed that comfort.  We all watched the moon in their room change phases for awhile and they slowly calmed down, drifting peacefully in their outer space room.

I kissed them goodnight and went downstairs.  Surprise!  Brian planned a quick date.  He ran out to the store while I was up with the boys and got the fixings for ice cream sundaes.  Maybe it was not the best Valentine's Day dinner, but dessert would surely make up for it.  Yum.  I can't remember the last time I actually piled a bunch of toppings onto a big bowl of ice cream.  We both sat on the couch with heaping bowls full of ice cream, reeses pieces, dark chocolate pieces, hot fudge, and whipped cream.  There wasn't a whole lot of conversation while we were gorging ourselves, but it was nice just to sit and relax together after the crazy excitement of two boys and bunk beds.  Ahhhhhh....  Sorry, no pictures of the sundae.  It was too big to fit in the frame.  Instead, here is a picture of the moon in their room.

These dates may not be something huge that takes a lot of planning, but they are still giving us everything we need... a little connection after a long crazy day.  I loved it, Babe!  You can't go wrong with ice cream.

Date 5 of 52: Card Tricks

I needed a quick date to fit into Brian's study schedule, something that could be done during a quick 15 minute break(Thanks for the idea, Mia).  Then I saw playing cards at the grocery store.  I love playing cards and new a few quick games.

One night we sat at the dinning room table and played away.  I started by teaching him how to play Peanuts.  It is a game I used to play with my grandmother, aunts, and cousins when we got together for holidays.  It is pretty fast paced, but easy to learn.  It also felt really god to remember all the fun times we had playing with Grandma.

Then it was Brian's turn to teach me a game.  He picked a game called Set Back, or Pitch.  You take turns betting and picking the trump suit.  It was a really fun game.  We ended up playing for quite awhile.  I had no idea Brian liked to play cards.  Yay, date night.  You can learn something new even after 11+ years!

So cards turned out to be great for both of us.  We haven't put the cards away since the date, and when we have a minute or two we sit down and play.  My competitive streak returned, and Brian learned that I am not a very gracious winner.  Ha ha, I won both games...all in good fun of course, but just to be sure we are all clear who won, here are the score cards.

Brian's View:  

To be completed after he has a master's degree or as soon as studying permits!

Date 4 of 52: The Lesson

This was Brian's date, but he is crazy busy with homework!  I decided to share it and he can add his view when he has time.

When we started Project 52 I thought a lot about date ideas, and then ideas started popping into my head for dates I thought Brian should take me on.  Of course they don't count if he doesn't think of them himself, right?  Well, I decided to use my telepathic powers and plant a date idea in his head.  I wanted him to teach me to play guitar.  I also mentioned the idea to a few friends of mine.  The more mind power the better!  Not long after that, having the patience of a 2 year old, I started dropping verbal hints.  When I mentioned that my finger nails were nice and short and would be perfect for my date idea, he figured it out.  Little did I know one of my friends had also taken matters into her own hands.  She friended him on Facebook and sent him a message telling him of my desire to learn to play guitar!  Brian and I tend to look at Facebook together, and I saw her message.  She was so BUSTED!  Of course I immediately forgave her since she is a great friend who only had my happiness in mind.  So, I got my guitar lesson!

Brian started out by teaching me the parts of the guitar, the names of the strings, and how to read guitar tab.  I played the trumpet growing up and new how to read music, but tab was totally new to me.  It took my brain a little while to switch gears and come at it from a different angle.  Then came the actual playing of the guitar.  It was really hard!  My fingers would not stay in the right spots no matter how hard I tried, and I could not press hard enough to dampen the strings all the way.  I sounded great.  Brian had fun watching the faces I made as I concentrated on the chords and had a good laugh at the pitiful dying animal noises coming from the guitar.  My finger tips started hurting after about 5 minutes, but I struggled on.  In the end I learned a handful of cords and the opening riff to Metallica's Enter Sandman.  By then my finger tips and Brian's ears were screaming for mercy.

My awesome and sexy teacher!

Brian was a great teacher.  He was patient and did a great job of explaining everything.  Then he sat back and just let me try.  When I was frustrated, he encouraged me.  When I complained that my fingers wouldn't work, he said it was normal.  I just needed time and practice so my finger muscles could form a memory.  It was a great date!  I hope to pick up the guitar a few times a week and play a little.  Maybe if I toughen up my finger tips he can teach me a tune or two!

Ouch!  My soft finger tips were numb for several hours afterwords.

Date 3 of 52: Back to the Beginning

The idea for this date came one night while Brian and I were going through our storage bins trying to de-clutter.  Brian opened up one of his many"memorabilia" bins, and it just happened to be one of his academy trunks, full of academy memories.  We started sifting through it all and were transported back to that crazy place and that crazy time...
The pictures, the little notes, the cards...each one had a very vivid memory attached to it, and it was good to remember.  I decided these things shouldn't be hidden in some trunk and forgotten.  They were too wonderful, dorky, mushy, you name it...seriously after looking at some of my sappy cards I wondered how he ever managed to continue dating me!
One particular card caught my eye and gave me the idea for our date.  The card was a collage, its message made out of letters and pictures I cut from different magazines.  The pictures and words painted a pretty good picture of what was important to us back then.  I thought it would be fun to make a new collage and see what we cut out now that some time had passed.  I thought it would tell a great story if I framed them and hung them on our wall.
So I selected a few favorite items from that trunk and then got down our other bins of pictures and cd's.  I got out the paper, scissors, glue, and magazines.  Once the kids were in bed we sat on our living room floor and began going through our life in notes, pictures, and video.  It was heartwarming and hilarious all at once.  I looked back at pictures of Brian when I first started giving him hair cuts.  He wore that shorn hair proudly, never complaining...now that is love.  I remembered our walks down by the waterfront, and getting chased by skunks.  There were so many of them, I think it was a secret academy security measure.  I grabbed another picture, again at the academy, eating dinner we cooked using just a hot pot, using frisbees for plates, trying to come up with some sense of a normal relationship.  Who knew, years later, cooking would still be a way for us to connect?

Graduation, the first apartment, the first good-bye on the pier, the first welcome home, the first vegetable canning attempt, the first renovation project, the first pet, the first child...

It is fun to think about it again even as I write this.  Well, as for the date, we got so caught up in the memories, we never even touched a pair of scissors.  There is no "then and now" collage hanging in our room, no pictures to share of what we made, and that is just fine.  In fact, I feel it is probably the way it was meant to be.  Those cards and pictures we gave each other were only meant to be seen by each other, and that is the way they will remain, hidden in a trunk, waiting for the next time we open it up and are transported back to that crazy place and the crazy time...

Well, look at me getting all sappy again.  I will leave you with a picture or two to lighten things up, from the days when I was dating a sweet 12 year old boy, at least that is how old he looked!

One of our "homemade" dinners at the academy.

At Brian's parent's house for a long weekend, out working in their yard.

Brian's View:

I'm not sure what to add here...I had a great time digging through our pictures and our "memorabilia."  Its fun to look back at the great times, how we turned tougher times into enjoyable experiences, and to laugh at everything in between.  This date was  a great reminder of how we got to where we are and what's important, all without becoming too sappy.

Date 2 of 52: The Fine Dining Experience

When it came time to plan my first date, picking the theme was easy: Jenn loves to get dressed up, but we haven't had many opportunities to do so for quite a while.  The annual Officer's Association "Dining Out" was the only opportunity to do so in Astoria, where closed toe shoes and a shirt with buttons is formal.  We haven't been able to go out here in town yet.  A "Fine Dining" Experience was it.

Late in the afternoon I told Jenn that we had reservations for dinner at 8:45 at a nice place and to dress accordingly.  Then, after she left for an afternoon appointment I went to work moving my clothes down to the downstairs bathroom and making dinner rolls.

I woke Mathias up from his afternoon nap at 5pm in fear that he may never  go to sleep that night and made chicken nuggets and tater tots for the boys for dinner (I was a little jealous of their menu and ate several myself).  Then, when 8pm finally rolled around, it was time for the boys to go down for the night.

Jenn took the boys upstairs, and I quickly got to work starting dinner and setting the table with our china.  I then ran down stairs to quickly shower, shave off my beard, and get dressed including jacket and tie.  Once back upstairs, I set a plate of brie and crackers out and put the chilled champagne on ice.  Then, all I had to do was wait; I felt like I was waiting at her parents' house for her to come downstairs for a first date.

Finally she came downstairs, I popped open the champagne, we shared some cheese and sat and talked.  I disappeared into the kitchen for about 10 minutes to steam the mussels with shallots, white wine, and a few freshly chopped tomatoes which I served over linguini - a favorite dish of Jennifer's that she hasn't had many times since we left Baltimore several years ago.

With dinner on the table I could finally relax.  The food turned out great, and it was a nice change of pace to just sit and talk, almost like it was before children when we could go out in Baltimore for a leisurely dinner whenever we liked.  The only problem was I couldn't find anyone to clear the table and do the dishes when it was over...

Jenn's view:
I was excited when I saw the mussels and champagne in the fridge.  Brian hadn't said a word about what was going to happen on our date, but I helped put groceries away earlier in the day, so some key parts were revealed  He did manage to hide the brie in there somewhere.  Brian told me we where headed to a classy joint and to "dress accordingly" so I had fun thinking about what I was going to wear.  I went out that afternoon to get a pedicure and came back nice and relaxed for out date.  Evidently that is when he moved all his stuff to the basement bathroom.

Mathias took over a 3 hour nap that day, so our date got off to a late start.  I was reading bedtime stories when Brian came up and told me he would pick me up at 9, a slight delay.  I finally got the kids settled into bed and got myself all dressed up.  I put on a slinky little black dress and a cute pair of peep-toe wedges.  They showed off my new pedicure beautifully.  Then into the bathroom to try to do something with my hair.  I had about 5 minutes to fix/hide that bump you get from having your hair in a ponytail all day.  I decided to try some major teasing with marginal success.  Hurrying now I applied some make up, for those of you that know me, that is a once-a-year occurrence.

I left the bathroom feeling more like a drag queen than pretty, but I was out of time.  I put on my red wool coat.  It matched my pedicure perfectly...did I mention that I loved my pedicure? I looked in the mirror, not bad.  Then, I waited.  I looked at the clock, he was late!  I went to the top of the stairs and sighed loudly.  Nothing.  I talked loudly to myself, "When is my date going to get here?"  Nothing.  Finally he came to the bottom of the stairs.  I took one look and all was forgiven.    He greeted me smooth faced and handsomely dressed.  I joked that he was late, and he said he had been waiting for me down stairs.  I said he told me he was coming to get me so I was waiting for him upstairs!

He offered his arm and walked me to the living room where brie and crackers were waiting.  He took my coat and went to hang it up.  I actually had those first date nerves.  I found myself checking my hair and fixing my dress before he came back.  We sat for awhile and relaxed.  He disappeared and then dinner was served.  He lead me to the dinning room where the table was set with our good china and crystal, complete with the toasting flutes from our wedding.  Candlelight set the mood.  He served mussels over linguini with homemade dinner roles, one of my favorites!  We sat, ate, drank champagne, and chatted like old times and smiled a lot.  Then he disappeared again and brought out individual apple crisps in little cast iron pans for dessert.  Delicious!  I have to admit by that time I had a very full tummy, a little to drink, and it was very late.  I was falling asleep at the table.  Brian cleaned up the bare minimum so the kids wouldn't destroy anything in the morning, and we headed upstairs.

Brian did a wonderful job.  I was so surprised to see him all dressed up and THRILLED that he shaved off his beard.  He grew it out over the holiday break to annoy his mother when she came to visit.  It worked.  Anyway, he picked a great date idea.  I really do enjoy getting dressed up, and he always cooks amazing food.  Next time we have to let the kids skip nap time so we can start a little earlier.
A+ babe!

Date 1 of 52: The Orange Bowl Tailgate Party

       To say that I was excited for our first date would be an understatement.  I woke up that day thinking of all the things I wanted to get ready for our big night.  It had to be perfect.  I found myself getting annoyed that the kids were awake and I couldn't get the show on the road.  I think I fed the boys lunch at 10:30AM trying to hurry the day long.
       The idea for our first date came pretty easily.  Virginia Tech was in the Orange Bowl this year.  Obviously we were going to watch the game.  Our usual tailgating group was disbanded for the holidays, leaving just the two of us, perfect!  Hokie Tailgate in the living room it is.
       I bought all the usual tailgate food, and drink.  I went to the local Hokie headquarters to snag some Hokie gear.  In keeping with the "spend little to no money" goal, I put back bean bag toss boards, big foam fingers, spirit pins, and two cart loads of other goodies and settled on two neoprene can koosies, with the VT logo on them...have to keep the drinks cold.  With the turtle's heat lamp on it is about 72 degrees in our living room.
       The day progressed ssssssssslowly.  By afternoon I was annoyed that the kids even existed, let alone that I had to focus on them and not our fun night ahead...really going to have to work on that.  Finally it was bedtime for the boys, only slightly earlier than usual.  Brian took bedtime duty, and I got to work.  I spread the only green blanket we have on the living room floor for grass.  It was a sickly color for grass, kind of sea foamy green.  Then I got out our camp chairs and little wooden folding table.  Sand from our last bonfire on the beach spilled out of the storage bag adding to the "outdoor" feel.  I paused for a moment fondly recalling that bonfire, but then quickly got back to work.  I put a cooler with ice and drinks on the grass next to the table, our new VT koosies filled with our beverages of choice on the table, and got to work preparing the other food.
       With chicken wings and cheese poppers in the oven, chips and salsa on the table,  and cheese and crackers forgotten in the fridge, I headed for the bathroom.  I am proud to say I managed to paint my own face while looking in the mirror and didn't end up with TV on my face instead of VT.  When Brian came downstairs he was all decked out in every piece of Hokie gear he owns.  I was happy to see he was getting into this, too.  He didn't even baulk when I said his face was next.

       We don't have a television, so Brian set up our computers to watch the game streaming live on ESPN3.com.  We set up both computers so we could switch just in case the feed froze on one in the middle of the game.  Of course it did, and we missed the second Stanford touch down.  Turns out there were many more to come so it didn't really matter.  To make things a little more interesting we took turns making up rules for the game, (ie. do this when the Hokies kick a field goal, do this when they score a touch down).  We clinked bottle necks and the date was on!


Brian's View:
       Let me begin by saying that the Hokies didn't fare as well as we had hoped...the second half was actually pretty painful to watch.  From the beginning of the third quarter when Stanford managed to cover 97 yards in two plays for a touchdown to the 7 sacks they managed before I lost count during the second half, the game wasn't what we had hoped to watch...
       The date though, was a blast.  Now that I'm not leaving for months at a time for work, we're finally able to spend some time together.    Together, though, often means doing dishes or grocery shopping - not exactly the happily-ever-after you first picture when you think about spending time together.  Project 52 has presented a great opportunity to spend some quality time together, to simply have some fun and enjoy each other's company.
       I'll admit I wasn't quite as excited as Jennifer was but I was looking forward to the evening as the day passed.  After putting the boys to sleep, complete with Mathias still wearing his #5 jersey over his pajamas, I changed into my orange and maroon effect t-shirts and grabbed my VT hat.  As I walked into the kitchen Jenn turned around  and I saw that she had painted her face...I knew there wasn't a chance I could get out of having my face painted too.  Fortunately, the tears running down my face as the brush tickled my eyes and nose weren't enough to make the paint run...
       After struggling to figure out the shutter delay feature on our camera we managed to take a few almost natural looking staged pictures, fired up the live video feed to watch the game, and cracked open our drinks.
       I'm not exactly the biggest football fan, but I had a great time sitting and laughing, mawing down on some (ok, a few too many) chicken wings and cheese bites, and generally enjoying spending some quality time with my wife.  Project 52 should be fun...hopefully I can stir up some creative juices and come up with a good idea for our date next week...

The Inaugural Post

To begin I need to thank a friend of mine.  She has shown me, through her kind words and good deeds, the kind of person I aspire to become.  I really don't have the proper words,  and I doubt she knows the impact she has had on me, but there is something about the things she says and the way she lives her life that just make me feel good and gives me hope for the future.  So, before this becomes too creepy, I will simply say, thank you, Mia, for being my inspiration.

Now, on to the reason for this blog.  I have considered starting a blog for some time as a way to stay connected with family as we merrily "Carroll Along" from place to place, but never got around to it until a thing called Project 52 entered our lives.  What is Project 52, you ask?  Well, let me paraphrase from a good friend's blog:  The original Project 52 is from a blog called Simply Modern Mom.  It is simply, or not so simply, one date night a week, without children, either at home or out.  One of you plans the date and the other is taken on the date.  You can alternate back and forth who is in charge of the date.  Whoever plans the date will blog about the date and whoever is "taken" on the date will give critiques.  Anyone else who chooses to join in on the project can comment and post as well.  We can share ideas and come up with interesting and fun ways to "date" our spouses.


Our version of Project 52 will be one date night per week, at home, after the kids go to bed.  Our goal is to get very creative, spend little to no money, reconnect, and have fun "dating" each other.  This year marks the first year in recent history that we will potentially see each other all 52 weeks of the year.  Like many military families out there, our family is often separated for many weeks, to months at a time.  Project 52 came along at the perfect time for us!  These weekly dates will help us set aside time to reconnect and just enjoy being together.  I can't wait to see what we come up with.  Join us.